As Muslim Women, as Mothers, Sisters, Wifes and all other roles we have in the society, we have to follow the best examples in order to be examples ourselves and to show the best and noble principles of our Religion.
Kindness is one of Allah’s beloved characterics so we should do our best to acquire it.
Especially, as Women, we tend to be more sensitive and emotional, and this can lead to be impatient, angry and the worse, to commit injustice. We should have knowledge of this very important quality and have to remind ourselves that this is something Allah loves.
When we are tested or facing some issues with people or with any other things harshness and rudeness are not the way to go about it.
In fact , Kindness is recommended in all matters.
And we can find these recommendations in the Qur’an and the Sunnah.
We will mention some of them :
لَقَدْ جَاءَكُمْ رَسُولٌ مِّنْ أَنفُسِكُمْ عَزِيزٌ عَلَيْهِ مَا عَنِتُّمْ حَرِيصٌ عَلَيْكُم بِالْمُؤْمِنِينَ رَءُوفٌ رَّحِيمٌ
There has certainly come to you a Messenger from among yourselves. Grievous to him is what you suffer, for he is concerned over you and to the believers he is kind and merciful.
Surah At-Tawbah 9:128
فَبِمَا رَحْمَةٍ مِّنَ اللَّهِ لِنتَ لَهُمْ وَلَوْ كُنتَ فَظًّا غَلِيظَ الْقَلْبِ لَانفَضُّوا مِنْ حَوْلِكَ فَاعْفُ عَنْهُمْ وَاسْتَغْفِرْ لَهُمْ وَشَاوِرْهُمْ فِي الْأَمْرِ فَإِذَا عَزَمْتَ فَتَوَكَّلْ عَلَى اللَّهِ إِنَّ اللَّهَ يُحِبُّ الْمُتَوَكِّلِينَ
So by mercy from Allah, [O Muhammad], you were lenient with them. And if you had been rude [in speech] and harsh in heart, they would have disbanded from about you. So pardon them and ask forgiveness for them and consult them in the matter. And when you have decided, then rely upon Allah . Indeed, Allah loves those who rely [upon Him].
فَقُولَا لَهُ قَوْلًا لَّيِّنًا لَّعَلَّهُ يَتَذَكَّرُ أَوْ يَخْشَىٰ
Speak to to Pharaoh mildly that perhaps he may be reminded or fear Allah.
Surah TaHa 20:44
إِنَّهُمْ يَكِيدُونَ كَيْدًا وَأَكِيدُ كَيْدًا فَمَهِّلِ الْكَافِرِينَ أَمْهِلْهُمْ رُوَيْدًا
Verily, they are planning a plan and I am planning a plan. So give respite to the unbelievers, deal gently with them for a while.
Surat At-Tariq 86:15-17
Aisha reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said:
يَا عَائِشَةُ إِنَّ اللَّهَ رَفِيقٌ يُحِبُّ الرِّفْقَ وَيُعْطِي عَلَى الرِّفْقِ مَا لَا يُعْطِي عَلَى الْعُنْفِ وَمَا لَا يُعْطِي عَلَى مَا سِوَاهُ
O Aisha, Allah is gentle and He loves gentleness. He rewards for gentleness what is not granted for harshness and He does not reward anything else like it.
Source: Sahih Muslim 2593
Aisha reported: I was upon a camel which was misbehaving so I began to beat it. The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said:
عَلَيْكِ بِالرِّفْقِ فَإِنَّ الرِّفْقَ لَا يَكُونُ فِي شَيْءٍ إِلَّا زَانَهُ وَلَا يُنْزَعُ مِنْ شَيْءٍ إِلَّا شَانَهُ
You must be gentle. Verily, gentleness is not in anything except that it beautifies it, and it is not removed from anything except that it disgraces it.
Source: Musnad Ahmad 24417
Abu Ad-Darda reported: The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said:
مَنْ أُعْطِيَ حَظَّهُ مِنْ الرِّفْقِ فَقَدْ أُعْطِيَ حَظَّهُ مِنْ الْخَيْرِ وَمَنْ حُرِمَ حَظَّهُ مِنْ الرِّفْقِ فَقَدْ حُرِمَ حَظَّهُ مِنْ الْخَيْرِ
Whoever is given his portion of kindness has been given his portion of goodness, and whoever is deprived of his portion of kindness has been deprived of his portion of goodness.
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 2013
Ibn Mas’ud reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said:
أَلَا أُخْبِرُكُمْ بِمَنْ يَحْرُمُ عَلَى النَّارِ أَوْ بِمَنْ تَحْرُمُ عَلَيْهِ النَّارُ عَلَى كُلِّ قَرِيبٍ هَيِّنٍ سَهْلٍ
Shall I not tell you for whom the Hellfire is forbidden? It is every person accessible, polite, and mild.
Source: Sunan At-Tirmidhi 2488
Aisha reported: A group of Jews asked permission to visit the Prophet and when they were admitted they said, “Death be upon you.” I said to them, “Rather death and the curse of Allah be upon you!” The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said:
يَا عَائِشَةُ إِنَّ اللَّهَ رَفِيقٌ يُحِبُّ الرِّفْقَ فِي الْأَمْرِ كُلِّهِ
O Aisha, Allah is kind and He loves kindness in all matters.
Source: Sahih Bukhari 6528
Jareer reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said:
مَنْ يُحْرَمْ الرِّفْقَ يُحْرَمْ الْخَيْرَ
He who is deprived of kindness is deprived of goodness.
Source: Sahih Muslim 2592